Sunday, January 3, 2010

Have a New Husband by Friday (?????)

Everyone is advertising this book and so I recently bought the CD thinking that such a claim had to have something good to say. After all who doesn't want a romantic, perfect man in 5 days, no waiting for heaven for perfection? And I have to admit I take great pleasure in figuring out where people come from on issues like this. And so I just bought this CD cold turkey without knowing anything at all about the author, just because the title sounded interesting! Well I would personally classify this one as pop psychology. I have only listened to the first 4 tracks.....and I am champing at the bit in annoyance. Firstly a man has written a book but a lady reads it, to me this is odd. Secondly, men are brought down to mere simpletons, or to the equivalent of Pavlov's dogs. Does this mean they are incapable of being good, or does it mean they can be excused for misbehaving. Everything is left up to the wife for a perfect marriage, and written by a man!

No discussion of sinfulness and the sinful nature so far. No talk of being made a new creatures in Christ, no talk about repentance or redemption.....surely for a Christian book that would be pretty basic? All I have heard on the first four tracks is that if I, as the wife, do the right things, my husband will be perfect by Friday. (Maybe I can get him to salivate too if I ring a little bell!) It makes me want to scream ! When Pavlov rung his bell at meal times his dogs began to salivate when the bell rang- food or not. And from hence forth we have 'Behaviour Therapy'! So if I respect my husband properly etc, is he going to be perfect and respond to me perfectly and all this by Friday? As my hubby says "ricadiculous"! And I say rubbish!

Don't get me wrong I am all for serving my wonderful husband in every way I can. I am not against self sacrifice and giving as a wife. But let me tell you neither my hubby nor I is perfect. Hubby sees his role as full of love and service too. It is a beautiful two way relationship. But pat solutions that this CD gives, does not consider God's mighty work in a marriage, or a dependence on Him for a good marriage; nor does it reflect the complexity of human nature or the different, beautiful, interesting and challenging personalities God has given us. It has not yet talked about praying when you face a difficult issue. Marriage is so much deeper and so much more than a few, "If you do this, then so and so will happen"

So am I going to finish the CD and groan read his 'How to have a New Kid by Friday'- yes, I bought that one too (I am sooo gullible!) Right now, I am just too cross about his over simplistic approach. But I guess I have made some pretty bold statements here and to give him the benefit of the doubt and to be fair I should get beyond the first 4 tracks. Maybe he improves as he goes along????

Anyway don't go out and buy those books in a hurry. I will try and get together a list of really good books on marriage and child training over the next couple of days! I apologise if I have offended anyone who really likes his work and who has read all the way through his books properly without jumping on their high horses, especially if he does get better after track 4. Do let me know if I have misjudged this man.

1 comment:

  1. Here is a valuable comment made by a friend via email! Joy

    I found with his "Have a NEW kid by Friday" book there was a very simplistic
    approach - which may work in some cases, but I haven't pursued the approach.

    I think his intention with these books is to sell to general public, but I
    think he's written some other titles that do have a Christian focus, so
    these books get promoted through the Christian bookshops as well.