Monday, October 5, 2009


Another little one was sent to bless our hearts and to be our friend. For just a very little while we loved this one as one of us. We planned and wondered what we should call this one when he/she with us first appeared as we crowded around gazing at the angel face, marvelling at God’s goodness and the amazing feat of what He could create.

But then the Lord wanted to take this little one to be with Him, another soul to praise His name for all eternity. This soul was made perfectly for the purpose of eternity.

And when I reach heaven gates I cannot wait to see those precious ones that have been conceived within my womb but who have left before I could hold and love and cuddle close to me…Yet secretly I feel that when I arrive in heaven I will be so caught up with gazing at God’s awesome face, that this will be my joy- his grace. I feel that I will be so caught up with this that there will be little time to be melancholy about where my loved ones are …for surely He is so wondrously great, far more than I can quite imagine now.

But this I know ….what a thrill I will get to meet my lovely babies right there besides me as together we sing out God’s greatness, in ecstatic rejoicing with hearts filled with perfect love, perfect peace , perfect joy…heaven, how I hunger and yearn to go ‘home’ one day.

So is God good in all of this, you ask, you wonder and you pry…why YES! Of course He is! He is the one who holds my hand , He walks with me and talks with me, He comforts with His gentle hand as He reaches down to touch us when we find the melancholy sadness too much. He sends His loved ones to cry with you and comfort and inspire, to help and to pray and care and just be with you. But at the end of the day, it is only God who can be there for every single care.

God is so good in a world full of sadness and evil…it takes faith to understand it and see it. Faith that I cannot give you, but God can, it is His gift and free to all will it receives. … For He is indeed so, so good.

Please note that this is not a theologcal discussion...we have no clear indication in scripture as to what happens to babies when they die. I believe though that just as John the Baptist was filled with the Holy Spirit in the womb, so too can any baby - it is by grace that God gives faith...this grace can extend to babies or mentally disabled if it so pleases God. We do not know God's purposes for each and every child. It is our hope and prayer that he has extended this grace to the children we have lost over the years and that this would bring Him honour and glory.

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